Saturday, April 17, 2010

Latasha Armstead

Latasha Armstead 372936
Taychedah Correctional Institution
PO Box 1947
Fond du Lac, WI 54936-1947

My name is La Tasha R. Armstead. I am currently 26 years old I was 13 years old at the time of my arrest and 15 years old when I got convicted of first degree homicide. I was sentenced to life with my parole set in 17 years which would be in four years (2-28-14).

Before my arrest, I was a quiet, shy, and a child with lots of pain and hurt built up inside. My birth mom chose to do drugs and run the streets instead of being a mother. I was raised by my grandma whose health started to deteriorate as the years past. At age six I had to start doing adult responsibilities, such as clean the house, dress my younger sister, care for my granny, sister and self. Then I started paying bills, going shopping for food and cooking added to what I was doing. I couldn’t get a legal job before my arrest, so I had to start selling drugs, from age six till my arrest. Since I was under a lot of mental and emotional pain, I ended up smoking weed, doing acid, and popping diet pills. I also tried Meth. I feared leaving my disabled grandma home alone, fearing someone would run in on her, while I’m away at school and hurt her. So I started missing a lot classes/ days at 4th thru 6th grade and was passed up anyways. I never made it to the 7th grade level being all that was going on and being in A. D.D./A.D.H.D.. as I have been for l3 years.

So far I have accomplished:.1)Anger management, 2.) Parenting,3. )Childhood abuse counseling, and 4) I’m finishing up math to receive my H.S.E.D.. It took long due to adjustment issues and I’m A.D.D./A.D.H.D..

I am now a woman whom even though was forced into the adult prison system, have grew into the maturity stage, I know how to respect and love myself, I have accepted Jesus Christ into my life, I’ve learned how to work and earn money. I have accepted responsibilities of mines and have made goals I aim to accomplish if I’m freed.

I believe I deserve a second chance because I’m human and I’m not perfect nor will I ever be. I made a big mistake without realizing it till too late. I took, not only the life of my victim, but also the victim’s family and my life as well. My world took a horrible spin and now that I’ve matured mentally, I want to get a second chance in order to give back to society by becoming a psychologist or social worker. I also want to open a place for troubled children. I now have a child of my own and don’t want him to fall into my past foot steps.


Wrote 8 -17 -2006 @ 1pm

Shhhhhhhhh…..Silence, listen to the wind. Thoughts cross your mind of what may or may not have been, if a soul wasn’t taken by your hands. Now close your eyes and count to ten. Do you see the bad memories flash across the screen again. Oh no, don’t cry don’t shed a tear, these are your fears. Yes the boogyman is here, don’t be scared.

Do you see her lifeless stare. You couldn’t have gave a fuck then, but now you care? Now lets play make believe, place a cord around your throat and tightly squeeze, can you even breath. Cut off your air supply, that’s what you did to her life, You know it should’ve been you to die, so don’t even wonder why. It’s the dance of death.


Wrote March 7, 2002

Dedicated to my son Emmanuel

How I wish I could place in your hand, the key to unlock the door marked “Understand”, so you could truly see what horror wasn’t meant to be. They say the truth never fail, but it’s one story I yet can’t tell…

I wish I could have you near, as I explain my love for you that I wish you’ll hold dear, But if you don’t its one of my biggest fears. I know when that day comes I’ll cry tears. One thing is for sure, that my love for you is very pure….

I remembered looking into those soft brown eyes, knowing I was going to tell you lies. About the reason why, you Mother wouldn’t be there, watching you walk, talk, laugh, cry, and share. Those special enjoyable moments, most mothers hold in their hearts ‘ documents….

I never meant for this to happen the way it did. If I could’ve only seen the future and understood whom tears really would’ve been shed, By the real fact of the nature. But the only alibi I have is being young and immaturely dumb. Of course I didn’t think in my life you’d come…

There’s not enough rough word to express how I feel, but for a fact everything I said so far is real, I know you deserve more than this. It’s one piece of the puzzle that will be missed, until your maturity, to recognize the reality, and why I was judged to be guilty…

I named you “Emmanuel” because it stood favorable, to my belief of the true meaning of ”God with us”, Hopefully you’ll see out my eyes that he surely was! Still he glows through your smile and the way your eyes happily dart around. I couldn’t become less proud of what he gave me to help stand my ground…

For I shall Always remember my blessing called Emmanuel.

Wrote 8 17 06 @3:15 pm
I stand 50 feet above the ground, on a building. I look down and see he cars moving, the children laughing , the adults talking. Then all Of a sudden it gets still and all i can do is hear the wind. i glazes my skin like a soft kiss. I close my arms and spread my arms wide as if attempting to fly . Scenes from my past flash before my closed eyes. I see my mother giving birth to me, my trying to suffocate my sister when she was a baby, me hating my sister and blaming her for my mom not being there, me growing older and becoming more evil, me hearing my mother telling me she didn’t want me or the duty of being my mother, her telling me I was a mistake , me wanting to die, me having sex at a young age just to feel loved and wanted and desired, me being beaten and raped by grown men, me joining a gang just to feel protected and belonged, me finally finding my missing half just to be snatched from him because we took a human’s life, me finally becoming a mother of a son who I couldn’t raise due to being found guilty and sentenced to prison and turning to women to raise me into the lesbian drama life. All this rush across my mind torturing my nerves. Tears gently fill my eyes and overflow to caress my cheeks, dripping to my mouth and seeps into the corners of me mouth to place a bitter salty taste on my tongue. Voices scream into my head asking “why me”- “help me” Erase this pain”-“end my misery” “ take me away –so far away”… Bu only one voice seems to cut through the others and that voice has said, “it’s finished, let’s go’> Eyes still closed, arms stretched out wide to the sides, tears still taking a stroll down my carmel face. I slowly stretch one foot out in front of the other as I tilt my head back and whisper to the heavens saying “forgive me Emanuel>” Then I feel my other foot escape the landing, as I fall 50 feet to the ground. I let the wind make love to my flesh as I realize it’s over finally and too late to turn back around> I feel myself hit the ground and my brains paint the sidewalk. I hear the screams of the adults , the terrified cries of the children and loud horns from the scars and tires screech against the pavement. But…but…. I can’t feel no more pain, I can’t see or smell, I feel a release and realize it’s my spirit lifting outta my body. It doesn’t float to the heavens, instead, it seeps into the ground. First class trip to hell. The last thing that plays is the song that explained my discomfort. The words to Amy Lee “My Immortal”, “These wounds won’t seem to heal, this pain is just too real, there’s just too much that time cannot erase”’s finally over…no more pain..
 by Latasha Armstead

1 comment:

  1. As I sit here reading your story,
    But for the grace of God stand I.
    I too am a product of the streets, and living in low income housing since I was 5yrs old, I left a very young age and continued a cycle of drugs and alcohol until I was in my late 40,s. I can't fathom even in my own personal experience, what you have gone through!

    Although i have served time in county jails and a 2yr prison sentence in California,is nothing compared to being 13yrs old a child in the system for life!!!!
    I want you to know I support with every part of me that now judges have a new way to sentence our youth in way s they can still hope for a future.
    We must pay for the crimes we commit one way or another, before God or in our so called 'justice system'. I pray your released at this very hour I am posting this here, April 10th 2016.
    I hope you are free, having the damage done in your childhood and a horrifically flawed justice system. If you are and are on FB in which I use to keep in touch with those I love, it would be such a honor for you to contact me.

    Love and Blessings,
    Renee Seabrooks